Peaceful

I hope everyone had a very merry Christmas! Mine was good, much easier than last year. Holidays are always difficult for my family and especially christmastime since Tyler loved it so much. Fortunately for me, I am surrounded by wonderful friends and family. It's hard to be sad when surrounded by so much love.

But now Christmas is over and my family and I took the fifth wheel down to Galveston for some R&R. I'm currently blogging on an IPad, listening to the ocean, and drinking some wine.

Emily and I always talk about things that are good for our souls. This my friends, is good for my soul. How do I know something is good for my soul?

For me, something is good for my soul when I find myself taking deep breaths that fill my lungs entirely. And without thinking about it. When I close my eyes and feel at complete peace. When I don't have to quiet my mind because it's already quiet. When taking a stroll down the beach fills me with joy.

The beach,any beach, is good for my soul. It's my happy place. I needed this after the whirlwind of graduation, the  panic of getting all my client hours, and the nerves of Christmas.

I hope everyone knows things that are good for their souls. Everyone is different. For Emily, being in a bookstore browsing books and drinking coffee is hers. Find something that fills your lungs completely and you find joy stirring in your belly. It's the best.

That's What Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown

So I was talking to a friend not too long ago and he was telling me how he wasn't a big fan of Christmas. You should have seen the face I made. It was a "Whaaaaaaaaat?! How could possibly not like Christmas?!" face. After I regained my composure, he explained himself and what he made a lot of sense. It also made me question why I like Christmas so much. He explained that it seemed like to him that society gets so wrapped up in the presents and the selfishness of the holiday and how it is overly commercialized.

After he said this, I really had to think about why I liked Christmas so much. I'm not going to lie, I love giving people presents. I loved doing all of my favorite Christmas traditions so much so I forget why we even celebrate Christmas in the first place. We celebrate Christmas because God loved us so much that He sent His son for us. It reminds me of a Charlie Brown Christmas. The whole theme of that movie is reminding us of the very same thing. I think Linus said it best of all.

"Linus: "And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, 'Fear not: for behold, I bring unto you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the City of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.' And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host, praising God, and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.'"
[Linus picks up his blanket and walks back towards Charlie Brown]
Linus: That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown."
So this Christmas I'm going to hold my family and friends a little closer and enjoy spending time with them.  I'm resolving not to get so wrapped up in the presents that I forget what Christmas is really about. God's love for us.

Dancing Queen

It's been a while. Lately I have been lacking the creative juices plus my immune system does not seem to like me. Que sera, sera.

I really like to Zumba. It's dancing, it's a workout , and I don't have to be walking or running on a treadmill feeling like the monotony is going to be the death of me. Zumba at my gym is offered a few days a week but I can only go to the Tuesday morning class since I don't work Tuesdays.

Let me just paint a picture of the Tuesday morning class for you. The average age in there is probably mid 40s. I'm the youngest in there by a good ten years. You have one lady in her mid 60s walk up to the instructor mid song and just start grinding on her. Then you have another lady who at random times yells out "WOO HOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" and then theres a 90 year old who is workin it. And when I say working it, I mean it.  Needless to say, this class is pretty entertaining. You can just tell that they are having a blast dancing like nobody is watching.

Maybe it's the endorphins but these ladies seem like they are loving every single minute of life. They are having fun and letting loose. It's such a nice reminder for me midweek that it's good to let your hair down sometimes. Life is way too short to be serious all of the time and sometimes I need to remember that. One of Tyler's favorite quotes was:

"you shouldnt take life too seriously you can never get out alive"-van wilder

Hope.

I went to church with my parents yesterday and I absolutely loved the sermon he preached. I was going to write a whole post about it but I just wasn't doing it justice. He spoke about hope. About having hope even during times where it seems hopeless. Obviously, it really resonated with me. It reminded me  that when Tyler passed away, having hope helped me during those early days of grieving.

I highly highly recommend you check it out.
http://fbca.org/sermonarchive?sermon_id=58

SelfCare

So yesterday was nuts. Thursdays usually are but yesterday in particular drained me physically and emotionally. I had the most intense session I've experienced in my short time counseling. I was helping my client with her anger. Out of nowhere, all my personal emotions came up regarding Tyler. After Tyler's death I was so angry. I know that's a stage of grief but it's the main thing I had to work through. I was so angry at things I couldn't control. I remember buying boxing gloves and a mat and just beating the crap out of it. So if you're angry and need to let it out, let me know and you can borrow my stuff. Believe me, it feels good. 

Anyways, I was talking to my supervisor about it. She knows about Tyler so I was telling her how that session brought up some things for me emotionally because I was identifying with my client so much. My supervisor without blinking an eye asks me, "So how are you going to take care of yourself tonight?". Man I needed to hear that. While I'm at my internship, I go non-stop but when I got home last night I was drained. I took care of myself by taking a bubble bath, drinking a glass of wine, and writing in my journal. 

We work so hard as a culture. We set high expectations for ourselves and do everything in our power to achieve them. What we're bad at as a culture? Taking care of ourselves along the way. Usually we use the excuse "I don't have time". You do have time. Take five minutes and pet your dog or stretch. Drink a hot cup of tea. If you have longer, go exercise or take a bath. Write. Read. Watch a corny movie. Treat yourself to whatever you enjoy that clears your mind. Treat yourself especially after you've had a long day or week or month but also try to take care of yourself everyday. You deserve it. 

Postsecret

This entry is basically going to be a shout out to another blog. I'm sure most of you have heard of this website before but I absolutely love Postsecret.com. Emily introduced it to me a few years ago and I have been reading it ever since.

People mail in their secrets from all over the world and every sunday the publisher picks a few to put on the website. He also has books and speaking tours. If you go to a bookstore and open a postsecret book, sometimes there will even be some secrets in there. Usually they look like this. I pinned this one to my pinterest account because I loved it.

The secrets range from heartbreaking to happy. They are raw, real, and utterly human. It connects people on a deeper level. People are able to see that some people share their secrets that they aren't alone in their battles. Some people even send in encouraging responses to secrets that get posted. I think it helps remind us that everyone has their demons but everyone has their empathy, kindness, and goodness within them too. Plus, they are an advocate for International Suicide Prevention. I highly recommend checking it out sometime if you haven't. Warning: it can be raunchy at times. I guess that's part of the human-ness of it?

And of course, favorite quote of the week so far: